It's June already, which means I'll be going to Mexico in almost two weeks! I think about it a lot, but maybe I'm caught up with school and activities and my mind just can't seem to process the fact that it's REAL and the time is COMING. A part of me is excited for new experiences, adventures, and change. The other part of me is scared--what will it be like? Will the people accept me? Will I enjoy it? Will I be lonely? But now that I sit down and reflect over it all, I remember that it's not about me. I know that it will be nothing I've ever experienced, but in the end, I'm going for the people there and to see the world in a new light.
Most of all, I feel unprepared. So many doubts run through my head, "I haven't read enough ", "My Spanish isn't good enough", "I haven't planned anything out." Soon I'll be entering the unknown. It's hard not to be afraid and to welcome what I cannot predict. It's hard to let go and tell myself, "Everything will be okay. God is in control.” This week has been rushed with trying to complete assignments and study. I haven’t actually sat myself down, calmed myself and put my trust in God.
The last few weeks of this quarter has been hard with exams and homework coming up. But today, when I got to catch up with good friends and really appreciate many of my friendships, I realized that there's more to life than academics. We were made to need connection, social interaction, and love. I found respite with my bible study group; it was the first time in a long time, I sat down, opened the bible, and took in the words. I was filled with joy just being around kind, insightful friends with whom I could create a community. Each and every day I continued to be reminded of how blessed I am by the number of wonderful, thoughtful, beautiful people that surround me. I am reminded that God watches over me; He gives me what he knows I need.
"The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."(Deuteronomy 31:8)
There's so much uncertainty and unknown in life, but that shouldn't make us worry. God is here and will remain by our side if we let Him. Putting trust in God, I have nothing to fear as I go to Mexico. Yes, I've never been there. Yes, I know no one there. But there's comfort in knowing God will be there protecting me and blessing me as He's done all my life. So as the day of departure gets closer, I get more excited and more nervous, but in those times, I know that God is there with me and He will do great things through my team and me while we're there in Mexico City!
-Jane Che
